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December 02, 2005

And from the fog, a light emerges

"Some people come into our lives and quickly go.  Some stay for a while and leave footprints on our hearts.  And we are never, ever the same".

Unknown

I have been eating very lightly over the past few days and it seems to have done the world of good.  I've actually just polished off a Kale and avocado salad which hit the spot very nicely indeed.  Today i've also had a chocolate smoothie, 2 pieces of raw chocolate (are you noticing a theme?), a handful of macadamias, and that's pretty much it from what I can remember.  I'm back on the juice tomorrow as i've only just had the chance to get to Tesco and do some shopping.  While I was in there I picked up a huge mixing bowl which was just under 4 quid, it's a simple thing but it made me happy!  As I was going through the checkout I saw my housemate Rachel on a till down the line so I waved my bowl at her to show my delight and she seemed very happy for me too.  The funny thing was, so did the woman behind her, standing in the queue who thought I was randomly waving a bowl at her.  She had one of those looks on her face that said, "I don't think I know you but you're waving a bowl at me in Tesco so i'm going to pretend I do know you, oh actually, you're scaring me now you freakish man".  You know one of those looks, i'm sure you see them all the time.

Getting into Tesco car park was a bit of a fun as well.  It was very windy this afternoon and as I was driving up to the store I had to dodge 2 trolleys that started to blow towards my car.  You should have seen my tactics to get round 'em.  My quick yet elegant manoevre enabled me to get my shopping with all the paint still on my car, which is always a perk!  Unfortunately the car that they did end up hitting had someone in it, I felt a bit bad for about a second and then worried that the guy in the car hadn't seen the trolleys and thought i'd hit him!

So anyway, since I last blogged the mental and emotional stuff seems to have lifted.  I'm much clearer in my thoughts even though i'm so tired I keep forgetting what i'm talking about when i'm half way through a conversation.  Mum came round for a cuppa (white tea) earlier and as I was talking to her, I completely forgot what I was trying to say, twice, about the same thing!  A good nights sleep tonight should sort things out, although I do feel remarkably perky for the amount of sleep i've had.

Went to see a lecture by Masaru Emoto on Wednesday night in London.  He's the guy who has photographed water crystals and has researched how thoughts effect their formation.  Check out his site and the photos if you haven't already, they are beautiful.  He's got some very interesting ideas, from what I could understand of his English!  The lecture started later than scheduled so I wasn't able to stay for the film otherwise I would have missed my last train.  Karen and I decided to leave after the lecture as she would have missed her train too.  We thought it would be a good opportunity to 'catch up' and go to Vita Organic for a feed at their new location in Soho.  We met some other Fresh members there and had a jolly pleasant evening.  My passion to bring raw foods to as many people as possible strengthens with every experience I have like this.  It was so nice to have quality food made for us and enjoy it in that kind of environment.  I don't know what was in the  dishes we had but since then my skin is probably the best it's been for months.  It could also be the fact that i've been eating so lightly that's responsible.

On my second trip of the day to Tesco earlier I took Lel who needed to get a few bits and pieces.  She had a bit of a moment at the clothes recycling  bank in the car park when she dropped all her old 'fat clothes' (her words, not mine) down the chute, never to be seen again.  All very significant and emotionally cleansing for her and a joy to see!

October 20, 2005

Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!

"Triumph is just "umph" added to try."

God's Little Instruction Book For Students

I did it!  Passed my pt 3 with flying colours and what a relief.  So much so that I cried when I drove home...very attractive!  Have had the most incredible 4 days of my life.  It's been the most exciting and scary thing i've ever done but what a feeling that is, what a feeling of being alive.  To achieve such a goal that's been nearly 2 years in the making is a very special feeling and now I want more!  What have I learnt from this?  Things don't always go to plan but persistence doesn't recognise failure.  I'm so proud of myself for that, i've stuck with this to the end.

When I came home this evening my housemates had bought me a card, balloon and bottle of wine which was lovely.  All my friends have been so supportive and wouldn't have been able to do this on my own, i'm very grateful.

So what now?  I've got a full day of lessons tomorrow and will probably be working solidly for the next week so I can fit all my pupils in before I go away. I've also got the small matter of thinking about handing in my notice at my old job.  I've been in that job for over 12 years and I can hardly believe that i'm now free to leave.  I drifted into that job when I was at college and never meant to stay for so long.  I didn't have a plan back then so I fitted into other people's plans and they they didn't have much planned for me!  Do you ever get that feeling that your life is going to take a sharp turn and that all the work you've done is suddenly going to take effect?  I really feel like i'm at a pivotal point now and it's very exciting.